These Insanely Petty Exes Will Make You Want To Be Single Forever

Short and sweet, m16. I like it.

“My ex slept with my best friend, so I slept with his best friend.”

Maybe they were just being polite, delaneystrunk?

“When we broke up, my ex returned EVERYTHING. That included five bobby pins, three Capri Suns, one bag of popcorn, and a tiny fake flower I had in my hair on one of our first dates.”


I dated this man that I worked with for three months and we were completely infatuated with each other. It was a whirlwind of a romance and I was so naive in the game of love that I believed everything… until one day at work, under the wiper on my car, I saw there was an envelope that was addressed with my first name and inside, there was a wedding invitation between him and his fiancé. I was unknowingly a mistress and I decided to take matters into my own hands. I took the name from the invitation, found her number in his phone, called her to discuss, and we ended up making dinner reservations with him as our server.

The look on his face when he walked up to the table satisfied me more than he ever did.

annibale979 are you actually Elle Woods?

“I applied to medical school after my ex tried and failed just to prove I was the smartest. I got in!”

Didgerididn’t you see that coming, katrinas490cf8b1d?

“My ex stole my DIDGERIDOO! I got it from Australia when I was in high school and I’m still pissed about it.”