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    John Stamos Showed Off His Butt On Instagram And Oh LAWD

    It’s barely been 24 hours since the 2017 eclipse and already we have another moon to obsess over. Namely, the perky, celebratory butt of John Stamos.

    That’s right, it’s Stamos’ 54th birthday and he decided to give the world a gift: the world premiere of his ass on Instagram. The Full House actor and forever-heartthrob posted this coy shot of him in an outdoor shower with the caption “#54 and clean. Thanks for the birthday wishes!”

    Let’s all just take a moment.

    Stamos’ Full House costars and friends also wished the “ageless vampire” a happy birthday. Albeit in a much less exciting way.

    But let’s be honest, the real star of the show is dat ass. Did you even scroll down this far? What are you doing? Take the rest of the day and go appreciate the immortal John Stamos in his birthday suit.

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    This Game Of Thrones Moment Has Fans Wondering If There’s A Home Depot North Of The Wall

    Spoilers for Game of Thrones season 7 below!

    There’s a lot to say about the pacing of Game of Thrones season 7. Some say it’s too fast, others might say it’s appropriate for the endgame of such an epic story to just kind of get to the point. We know the characters, we don’t need another season of them walking through the woods and chatting. Time to f*** some s*** up with dragons. You know?

    Still though, the accelerated pace of this season means that the timeline is a little screwy and some things aren’t really being explained. How long was the walker-heist crew stuck in the middle of that lake? Days? Weeks?

    However, it seems one unexplained detail in that episode has shook the fanbase more than anything else. The burning question on everyones mind that has sparked debates, arguments, theories, and photoshops.

    Where in the seven hells did the White Walkers get those giant-ass chains?

    Like, for real. I get that they’re a zombie army guided by dark magic that also has never really been explained, but WHERE DID THEY GET THE CHAINS? Chains are such a pedestrian tool. Do they have a warehouse somewhere making hardware for this specific occasion? Why were they so prepared?

    Needless to say, the fans have taken to social media to politely ask the same questions.

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    This Tiny Detail About Jon’s Sword Has Fans Freaking Out About What’s Next On GoT

    Game of Thrones season seven episode six spoilers below!!!

    Another week, another tiny thing for Game of Thrones fans to freak out about until the next episode comes along and gives us new things to freak out about. This one comes to us courtesy of Redditor miba54 who noticed something weird about Jon Snow’s sword.

    A little context: Towards the end of the epic lake battle sequence, Daenerys takes off on her dragon with whats left of the Westeros suicide squad, and leaves Jon Snow behind. He’d just been tackled by a couple wights right into the lake and things weren’t looking good. Plus, the Night King was gearing up for his second gold-medal-worthy javelin throw.

    Of course, Jon Snow survived because this is End-Game of Thrones and cool people don’t die anymore. He hoists himself out from under the ice, grabs his sword, and gets ready for the next round.

    That’s when this happens:

    See it? Longclaw’s eye appears to open as Jon comes up and grabs it.

    What does this mean? Possibly nothing. But that won’t stop Game of Thrones fans from debating endlessly about the possible implications. Could Bran have warged into the sword? Is the sword alive?! WHAT IS HAPPENING?!

    The prevailing theory on Reddit seems to be that it’s just Jon’s hand reflecting in the gem that makes Longclaw’s eye. The only problem with that is Jon’s hand is behind the sword so — you know, that’s not how reflections work. Plus it doesn’t account for the fact that the eye really appears to have a lid that opens sideways. Kind of like a reptile’s eye.

    Some also seem to think that it’s just water droplets hitting the sword. Directly on the eye. And not anywhere else. And creating the perfect shape and color of an open eye. On a very obvious close-up shot of the sword. Hmm…

    Either way, we’ll have to wait and see. It’s possible that Longclaw is just a sword, after all. But this is Game of Thrones.

    Everything means something if you want it to.

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    25 Products That Every Game Of Thrones Fan Needs To Own Right Now

    Are you a Game of Thrones fan? Who am I kidding, you’re alive in 2017 — of course you’re a Game of Thrones fan. Or you’re one of those holdouts who thinks they’re so cool for not being on the mainstream ship everyone else is happily sailing on. Congratulations! You don’t watch a show! What’s it like to be that interesting?

    For the rest of us, we relish in our Game of Thrones fandom. The anticipation, the predictions, and the merch. The glorious merch. And as the show wraps up, you’re running out of time to grab yourself the best Game of Thrones stuff and make it your own.

    1. Like this candle that every dragon mother needs in her cave.

    It’s got a baby dragon inside! A BABY DRAGON!

    Get it now on Firebox.

     

    2. Or this Iron Throne toilet seat decal.

    That’s right. May your poops unite all the seven kingdoms in peace and harmony.

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    3. Hold the door while wearing this Hodor Christmas sweater!

    Then try not to cry!

     

    4. Or, if you don’t have a soul, you can use one of these Hodor door stops.

    Because why deal with the pain and sorrow of life when you could just laugh at it. Just keep laughing! That’s right. That’s healthy.

    Get them now on Amazon.

     

    5. Oh, and if you haven’t read the books, these beautiful hardcovers are a good place to start.

    And if you’re thinking “But there’s more books coming out! Why would I buy a box set now?!” Well… I got some bad news for ya.

    Get it today at ThinkGeek

     

    6. This Jon Snow phone case is just as sulky as the real Jon Snow.

    No one will see when you kiss it goodnight every time you go to sleep. No one.

    Get it now on Society6

     

    7. This Stark lamp will make your allegiance loud and clear.

    Good thing, too. Because from what I hear the north doesn’t forget. Or something like that.

    Get it now from BoxLunch.

     

    8. Kill time with this Game of Thrones coloring book.

    It’ll get you through that promo of Ballers before every episode.

    Get it now on Firebox.

     

    9. If your favorite character is Hot Pie, then this wolf cake pan is a must have.

    Hell, even if he’s your second favorite character. But obviously he’s in the top 5.

    Get it now on BoxLunch.

     

    10. Game of Thrones Monopoly. Need I say more?

    You could get at least one game in while we wait for the next season!

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    11. Cersei is slightly less horrifying as this adorable pop doll.

    Still though, it feels like she’s going to lock me in a cage and kiss me with poison lipstick…

    Get it now on BoxLunch.

     

    12. Don’t open a beer without your hand.

    The hand of the king that is. This bottle opener will make you feel proud to serve whoever it is you’ve managed to lie, kill, and cheat your way next to.

    Get it now on ThinkGeek.

     

    13. The Mother of Dragons is useless without her dragon wallet.

    You think chain-breaking and throne-taking is free? Hell no, mama need her plastic.

    Get it now on ThinkGeek.

     

    14. This t-shirt makes Dragonstone look like a band.

    Game of Thrones fans will love the reference, and non-GoT fans will think you’re cool for knowing about an obscure band. Win/Win!

    Get it now on ThinkGeek.

     

    15. Need something to feed your watch party? Check out this official Game of Thrones cook book.

    Just stay away from the chapter on Frey-pies. You don’t wanna know what’s in those.

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    16. Make a back-to-school statement with this official Stark banner.

    That statement is “Yes I like Game of Thrones more than our division 3 basketball team, Karen.”

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    17. Be the shield — with this awesome coffee mug!

    Because no one can guard the wall, or unite the seven kingdoms, or shovel sh** for the Maesters without their morning cup of coffee.

    Get it now from HBO.

     

    18. Make Westeros great again with this election t-shirt.

    It’s not like they’re ever gonna win, right? Right?

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    19. Kill a little time between episodes with these playing cards.

    You can even invent a new card game. Like a combination of Black Jack and Go Fish. Call it Blackfish. That was a long walk, but we got there together.

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    20. When the show’s over you can drink the pain away with these Stark shot glasses.

    I drink, and I throw up on things.

    Get them now on Amazon.

     

    21. Or be an adult and drink from this Lannister wine glass.

    Unleash your inner Cersei. But like… not too much.

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    22. Put your GoT knowledge to the test with this trivia game.

    After a while, you’ll memorize the answers and people will think you’re some kind of complete loser. It’ll be awesome.

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    23. This Longclaw letter opener will make you feel like you’re fighting White Walkers.

    When you’re really just fighting a mounting pile of credit card bills. Same thing though, basically.

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    24. Can’t climb the wall without this official House Stark carabiner.

    Safety first, kids.

    Get it now on Amazon.

     

    25. Never send an un-epic invitation again with this wax-sealing stamp.

    No one will be able to resist a sealed letter. Especially Varys. Watch out for that guy.

    Get it now on Amazon.

    To be clear we may receive a portion of the sales generated from this post, and use it to pay our debts to the Iron Bank.

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    That Death On Last Night’s ‘GoT’ Has The Whole Internet Grieving Together

    Spoilers for Game of Thrones Season 7 below!

    In its 7 season run, Game of Thrones has had no shortage of heartbreaking deaths. It started with Ned Stark, which quickly set the tone for what would become a show where no one is safe, and heroes don’t always get to escape doom.

    Robb, Catelyn, Oberyn, that old guy who used to hang out with Daenyres, Jon Snow kinda… Game of Thrones is a punishing ride.

    With a whole gang of side-characters marching into the Westeroses most dangerous region to carry out possibly the worst heist plan ever, last night’s episode was almost definitely going to have a heartbreaking death or two. Some thought maybe The Hound, or Jorah. Some even thought it would be Jon Snow… again.

    Then this happened.

    Shit.

    NO!

    WHYYYYYY!

    Yeah. They killed Viserion. And to make matters worse, the White Walkers dragged the poor guy out of the water and brought him back as a zombie ice dragon.

    Pretty much no one saw it coming, and the internet had to do what it does best — come together and grieve.

     

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    The Funniest Reactions To That Jon And Daenerys Moment In Last Night’s Game Of Thrones

    Game of Thrones season 7 spoilers below!!!

    Westeroses hottest new couple is Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen. I don’t care if they’re aunt and nephew — they will be together and they will make beautiful half dragon/half hipster babies.

    For this entire season, Jon and Dany have been locked in a will-they-won’t-they not seen since Ross and Rachel. The entire Game of Thrones fanbase is waiting, with bated breath, to see if one of them will make a move, or “bend the knee” as the kids are calling it.

    Last night, things got closer than ever.

    They held hands! They also stared longingly at each other! Then Jon called her “Dany,” and she was like “nah” and then he called her “my queen,” and she was like “hell yeah” and everyone watching was like “omgomgomgomgomg.”

    The point is, it’s going down harder than a White Walker eating Valyrian Steel cereal, and people have FEELINGS:

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    Trending

    41 Tweets You’ll Only Find Funny If You Watched Last Night’s Game Of Thrones

    Game of Thrones season 7 spoilers below!!

    Last night’s Game of Thrones had it all. Ice. Fire. Dragons. Flaming zombie bears. Sad things. Happy things. Funny things. Creepy things. All the things!

    Most of all, it had people on Twitter going nuts. Here are the best reactions to last night’s Game of Thrones.

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    Everyone Is Finally Coming Face-to-Face On Next Week’s Season Finale of GoT

    Season Seven of Game of Thrones happens to be a short season – only seven episodes. That’s because some of the episodes exceeded the 60-minute mark this season and, writers and producers decided to cut the “final season” into two short seasons – Season Seven and Season Eight.

    Now that we’ve had six jam-packed episodes, we’re almost at the season finale, which appears next week. During last night’s episode, we finally had a lot of questions answered and progress was most definitely made. Now, Jon Snow is not going around complaining about Winter and White Walkers without actual proof – seeing as Dany saw them with her own two eyes (as well as some others). But, even worse, we now have a White Dragon to deal with and fear. Does he spit fire? Does he spit ice? Will he die with dragonglass? Will Dany be able to even kill her own child?

    So, so many questions are now unanswered – until next week.

    In the preview for Episode Seven – the season finale – we’re getting something everyone has been waiting for. Everyone is finally coming face-to-face at King’s Landing.

    We saw during this episode that Sansa Stark received a raven inviting her to King’s Landing – but declined to go (she sent Brienne instead). But, we’re seeing in this preview everyone else is joining in on the family reunion of the Lannisters.

    Tyrion has spoken to his brother Jamie recently but hasn’t seen Cersei since he escaped his execution. Now, he’s coming face-to-face with the fact that he’s standing on the opposite side of his family and his family’s army. It may be uncomfortable and awkward for these three to hash things out – but, knowing Tyrion, he’ll have some witty comments about the entire thing.

    We also have Jon Snow coming face-to-face with Cersei and the family that slaughtered the rest of his family – although he isn’t aware he’s not actually a Stark. There has to be some emotional distraught for him. But, he is there for one sole purpose – to get the Lannisters to ally with them against the White Walkers.

    It’s time for everyone to put their sh*t aside and team up against the Army of the Dead. But, will they be able to?

    Knowing Cersei Lannister – I think not.

     

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    Trending

    58 Utterly Random Thoughts I Had While Watching Last Night’s GoT

    Episode six of Game of Thrones got leaked hella early this week – half due to HBO Spain and the other half due to asshole hackers who can’t respect art and hard work (yeah, I’m talking to you).

    While everyone kind of knew what was coming already via spoilers and leakage (not the anal kind) no one can hack my mind to hear the insane things that run through it every time I turn on HBO to watch this brilliance – take that, internet trolls.

    1. Is this foreshadowing to fire-y deaths? Where is everyone? Is Jon Snow alive? F*ck, I need to pause and pour more wine for this. 

    2. Oh here we go, the Avengers take the other side of The Wall.

    3. “How’d you get your balls from freezing off?” GOOD QUESTION – need answers, NYC is cold AF in the Winter.

    4. Is it me or is this the most RANDOM group of GoT characters I’ve ever seen?…I don’t hate it.

    5. Jorah and Jon hanging out is super awkward because Dany definitely wants to f*ck them both. It’s like the finalists on the Bachelorette grabbing beers together – “hey guy, I know we want the same girl and all but, cheers.”

    6. Jon Snow, ALWAYS trying to do the right thing. Jon Snow 2020, Dump Trump.

    7. Arya talking about Ned Stark watching her shoot arrows makes me miss my dad so much. I’m in my feels. SO MUCH FEELS. (RIP Ned Stark/Arthur Tanney).

    8. Oh. sh*t is about to get REAL between Arya and Sansa. They’re squaring off like my sister and I did when I used to steal her clothes. 

    9. Arya don’t fall into Littecreeper’s trap…

    10. Wait she has a point. Arya’s loyal AF, Sansa, she just wants power it seems.

    11. Wait maybe Sansa has a point too – she did help Jon win the Battle of the Bastards. I CAN’T CHOOSE. THIS IS HARDER THAN PICKING WHAT TO EAT FOR DINNER.

    12. Lyanna Mormont would never put up with this, just saying.

    13. The Hound is me when I’m hungover – everyone “f*ck off.”

    14. I wish someone talked about me the way Tormund talks about Brienne of Tarth.

    15. Dany and Tyrion talking about Jon Snow, she secretly wants him to want her…even if he’s her nephew. *eye roll*

    16. DON’T CALL THE LITTLE MAN LITTLE, DANY. WHERE ARE YOUR MANNERS?

    17. Episode after episode, Dany is becoming more and more power hungry this season. Did someone say The Mad Queen?

    18. Omg my heart is pounding. There’s so much snow. I can’t see anything.

    19. Is that an undead BEAR??? Ugh why is The Hound such a p*ssy? DON’T JUST STAND THERE, DO SOMETHING.

    20. I’ll pay the writers $100 to kill off Littefinger before Season 8. Ok, $200.

    21. Here we go baby – the BATTLE of life vs death.

    22. That army looks like a crowd trying to shop on Black Friday in America.

    23. Poor Gendry, always running, rowing or trying to escape from someone.

    24. Yes Jon, kill the Night King.

    25. The Hound coming in with every Atheist’s Tinder bio.

    26. Sansa Stark growing up, right before our eyes. From housewife to savage in 3 seasons.

    27. DANY WHO’S YOUR STYLIST GIVE HER MY NUMBER. THAT JACKET. TO DIE.

    28. Oh sh*t, SHE’S GOING NORTH OF THE WALL?? WITH DRAGONS??? NO WAYYYYYYY.

    29. If I had a dollar for every time The Hound said “c*nt” I’d be FILTHY RICH.

    30. Oh. You dumb c*nt!!!!

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    The Actual Battle of Fire & Ice May Be Coming After The Latest GoT Episode

    On the sixth episode of season seven of Game of Thrones, we lost one of our most prized characters (mythical creatures) on the show – Viserion. One of the three dragon/children of Daenerys Targaryen, he was struck down by The Night King during the battle beyond the wall and eventually, turned into a White Dragon.

    Now, I’m not sure about you, but I have a lot of questions. We’ve seen the White Walkers and their abilities to attack without suffering any death – unless, of course, they’re stabbed with dragonglass or Valyrian Steel. But, with a dragon – does the game change?

    Think about it…

    Dany’s dragons breathe fire and, it’s the main leg-up she has on all of her enemies – the ability to burn down entire kingdoms with the simple mutter of the word “Dracarys.” But, do White Dragons breathe ice now instead of fire?

    It seems completely plausible that they would become much like Mr. Freeze’s gun – turning people into blocks of ice in real-time. And, if this were the actual case, who would win in a battle of Fire vs. Ice?

    Science says that fire will melt any ice – but, if Viserion is breathing ice, how will Drogon and Rhaegal stop him/save people without burning them to death? It’s a question that I demand answers to. And, is this the battle of fire and ice that everyone was speaking about for so long? Sure, we can say that Jon Snow is ice (being from the North and bringing the reminder of Winter everywhere he goes) and Dany is clearly the fire (she thrives in the flames).

    But, Jon is actually a Targaryen people – so, it could be possible that Jon is also fire, we can’t really know unless he pulls a Dany and lights an entire building on fire and emerges naked and alive. And, if Jon is fire – who is the ice now?

    It would make sense that the battle of fire and ice would be the now White Dragon vs. Dany’s two other dragons and make for the ultimate show down for all the ages. Here’s hoping fire takes it all!