You never know with first dates. Sometimes sparks fly and you enter a fairy tale that puts you in a 6-year relationship before you can say “Do you wanna split an appetizer?” But more often than not you have to sit across the table from someone who either can’t shut up or can’t seem to come up with a single thing to talk about other than his ex. Then you have to go home, alone, disappointed, unsatisfied, and wishing you could just build some kind of boyfriend robot.
All of us are waiting, and hoping, for that one date that somehow goes well. The date that exceeds our expectations, catches us off guard, and gets us excited about the future.
Those dates can and do happen, and this AskWomen thread is proof.
1. From user SoftApricot:
Tinder date. As fate would have it, we had spoken for 6 weeks before meeting.
He was lovely and I was keen but he had let me know he was shy and that he wanted to work on his face-to-face communication skills.
I expected a really shy guy, so I came armed with light getting to know you questions. I am a trained counsellor and figured the first meeting might be a bit of making him feel comfortable, not putting too much pressure on him, but rather thinking how i could support him in not being too nervous. I spent so much time googling ‘getting to know you questions’.
None of it mattered because I couldn’t shut him up. It was so natural and just flowed. The restaurant had to beg us to leave so they could close. I asked him about it much later, and he said he was surprised as he had never talked that much in his life.
A year later he asked me to marry him. So I’d say it went pretty well!
2. From user ambivalent_graffiti:
I wanted nothing to do with my SO when we first met. He showed up to the bar I worked at with a super douchy guy. They ended up hanging up with a girl whose character I was not okay with, and my SO’s douchebag friend started dating that girl right away.
Every time my SO came to the bar with them, he would drift away from their table and hit on me. Long back story short, I assumed that the girl in question had told him that I would be an easy lay, so I was NOT nice to him when he would do this.
Then, one day I was bartending in the afternoon and I brought my dog with me. SO shows up and spends like 3 hours sitting with my dog. At one point he asked me whose dog it was and if he could take him for a walk. They had the best time together.
When he left, he gave me his business card and said I should call him if I need someone to watch the dog while I’m working. I figured that my dog was a good judge of character and maybe I should give this guy a chance. I texted him that night and pretty much said the dog was fine, but that I could use some company.
He never texted back.
At that point, I wanted nothing to do with him. Like, fuck this guy who bothers me for weeks and then can’t be bothered to return a text.
The next weekend, he comes full-on running up to the bar, flings the door open, and yells “They printed my business cards wrong!!!”
He was so upset when he realized the number was wrong, that he RAN like 1.5 miles to get to the bar to tell me. It immediately melted my heart. I told him to hang out until my shift was over and he could be my date to a party.
We’ve been dating for 3 years, and I now think that he is the greatest person in the world.
3. From user ramamamathrowaway:
We were supposed to be going to a restaurant we both really enjoyed (must have been our fourth date). He met me at the train station in the pouring rain, walked around the corner to find said restaurant surrounded by fire engines. Plan A ruined. Busy Saturday night and no hope of getting a table anywhere else. He rather meekly suggested we could get stuff and go back to his, and he would cook me whatever I’d enjoy, if I was comfortable with it. I said yes.
Anyway, turns out he was really good at cooking dinner and breakfast. A few years of marriage and a couple of kids later, he’s still pretty good in the kitchen.
4. From user surrounded_by_ghosts:
Want to know the truth? I’ve had some awkward and mediocre first dates that showed that even when there’s no chemistry people can still be good.
Like the guy I met who was so nice, but not what I was looking for at all. He asked if he could hug me, I said yes. We talked later and both agreed that there was no chemistry. And that was it. No weirdness. He was a good guy
5. From user Dogzillas_Mom:
Scene: Late 1980s (I’m An Old®) Me: Senior Him: Freshman
Waiting for the bus to go to some field trip thing (don’t remember exactly), talking to my good friend I’d been buddies with all year. He asks who I’m going to prom with. I tell him nobody. He’s not having it. What do I mean I’m not going to prom? I tell him I asked a couple people who already had dates/turned me down flat, and nobody had asked me, so… Meh. I’d gone to a prom at another school the previous year, so I’d had the experience and didn’t care much to repeat it.
Guy is still flabbergasted, can’t believe I’m not going. Finally, in exasperation, I tell him, “Guy. If it’s so damn important to you that I go to prom, why don’t you go with me?” :: record scratch sound :: “Really?” He says. “You’d go to prom with a Freshman?”
“Only if he’s cool,” I say with a wink. (This guy was smooth as butter at the tender age of 15. I’d always respected how he was bold and fearless, yet not cocky or arrogant in any way. Just self-assured, confident, and ballsy AF.)
So we rush around one week before the thing. I find a dress I sort of like, hated the color, but whatev. He gets a tux. Without talking about it or coordinating, we ended up matching perfectly. My dress was pink and his tie and cummerbund was this nice pink Hawaiian pattern (see also: Bold AF). My friend is not driving her bitchin’ Camaro because her BF is driving them, so she offers to lend it to me to drive. Because my date isn’t old enough to get his license yet. LOL
We meet up with another pair — both of whom we were both pretty good friends with — and go to dinner. Then to the dance at a ski lodge that was obvs closed for the summer. Then our class had rented a racquetball club — the entire facility — so people could play racquetball, or use whatever other things in the facility. One of the rooms was set up to show some movies. We opted for the movie, which was The Fly with Jeff Goldblum and Geena Davis. I fell asleep on him. Then off to the Ponderosa breakfast buffet.
No funny stuff, no fooling around, no pressure, just a really great time. He was funny and charming and just a delightful date. We both had a great time and he came to my graduation party. Soon thereafter, I went off to college and never saw him again.
Thanks to M. Zuckerburg and his algorithms, this guy’s name popped up in my feed as a suggested friend, “Dogzilla_Mom, do you know [Prom Date]?” Hells yeah! I click the friend button. He messages me a couple days later. We move off FB to text. That turns in to FaceTime and many, many late night phone calls. Finally, we agreed, this is friggin’ perfect and we’re totally made for each other.
He just moved in. After 30 years.
:: mic drop ::