I worked in a combination regular and adult video store just after college. Largest adult video store in my city! This is back in the early 90s when video ruled. The owner of the store had a deal with a guy who had a series of neighborhood newspapers in our town. In exchange for advertising, the owner gave the newspaper owner’s family free rentals.
One busy Friday evening, the newspaper patriarch comes in and looks around in the adult section for a bit. After a while he came down to the counter and waved a co-worker over. He asked “Where do you keep the good stuff?” My co-worker asked what he meant by good stuff. “You know … farm animals and stuff.”
The guy left, disappointed. If he was still alive a few years later, I bet he had a good time online.
Just thought of another one. I work at Spencer’s which sells sex toys and lingerie along with gag gifts, jewelry, and birthday stuff. A lady who had to be pushing 80 years old hobbles into the store using her walker, and I give her the typical “hi, anything I can help you find?” She then proceeds to ask me if we sold any vibrators that used C batteries or plugged into the wall because “those ones are stronger” and the other ones just wouldn’t do it for her. I was somewhat impressed that this little old lady was still going at it.
In the adult store where I work there is a cinema in the back of the store. Customers pay an entry ticket for a day and walk into the cinema area which has around 15 cabins where they can watch all sorts of points movies. Some of those cabins are “connected” with glory holes. My job is to sell the tickets and after my shift which ends at 12am clean out the buckets in mentioned cabins.
There are so many incidents where I am greeted with buckets full of pee and or poo it’s crazy. There is a nice modern restroom in the cinema and the buckets are only for your cum tissues.
On another day I had to wake up a guy sleeping naked in one of the cabins in his own jizz. In addition to that he was drunk so you can imagine how much fun it was to deal with that situation at the end of a shift.
Let’s see.. I’ve seen my fair share of burritos, tacos and titties. Had a girl ask me what size her piercing looked like. I don’t know why but so many people loved to show me their nipple piercings. Had a girl ask all of my male workers to feel her new boobs to tell her of they felt real.
Best one, had a guy come in and buy a vibrating butt plug. While he was purchasing it he was acting very strange. It was clear he was on something, not too uncommon for that store in that area though. He then proceeds to insert butt plug into what I can only assume was his butt. I protested, but really he was high, his mind was made up and I knew there was no stopping him. Plus I’m a gilr, was all alone and at the time I was only 19, what was I really going to do?.. He starts talking nonsense and tries to leave, only he’s not doing a very good job. Suddenly he falls over and passes out. I go and nudge him with my foot and he just groans at me. I call security and the cops. He comes to as the cops come walking in and yells at me for calling the cops. EMS comes, I explain to them what happened and tell them there is a butt plug in his butt. One guy looks at me confused while the other guy just laughs. Filled out a police report and banned him from the store.
I wasn’t working at the time (I was 3rd shift) but during the day a group came in with a baby in a stroller. They hid a few Halloween costumes in the stroller and tried to steal them. An employee stopped them and they took the baby out of the stroller and left. But then one came back in and sprayed pepper spray in the employees face. The police took the stroller for evidence.
There was also the guy in the powder blue suit who had vomit down his back. He camped out in our bathroom for about an hour before we asked him to leave and he asked us to call him a cab, which we did and they wouldn’t take him where he wanted to go so he asked us to call him an ambulance. So here I am on the line with a 911 dispatcher who’s asking me if I can do mouth to mouth if necessary (oh goodness… I guess? If I have to…) and cops show up within like 90 seconds. Dude can’t keep straight if he has chest pains or stomach pains, the ambulance hung out scaring all the customers away for like an hour and the nsfw part is that the bathroom stunk for like 3 weeks after he was in there.