Come on, we know it was you:
Farting… MY husband thinks he is slick and does those silent but deadly farts. The smell kills me
Maybe try to look at our eyes during convos:
Look at my boobs, even when they are covered up. You tend to see them loose eye contact and get mesmerized, it’s rather funny
Utterly obvious:
Checking women out. I can see your entire head turning, dude.
Relatable:
How hard they’re trying to impress me right now only to completely ignore me once I’ve fallen madly in love. I’m onto you guys.
Basically:
When they offer to let me go up the stairs first so they can look at my ass. I don’t mind, I take it as a compliment.