Told everyone in school I hit her.
Picture it. 2014. 19 years old. (Partially) Living close to college with my then boyfriend. Until I came home from class early and caught him in bed with another girl. He then promptly dumped me and gave me two days to move my stuff out. I wasn’t worried about where to go, I could move back in with my former roommate and current best friend. But I would get revenge. On my last day to get my stuff, I snuck in while he was at work. I had two gallons of fine glitter from my friend’s craft stash. And within an hour, there was glitter everywhere. But then I heard the door lock turn and I took emergency measures. I had a horrible journey down he fire escape. I’m this rush, I forgot to grab my stuff. The next day, I wake up to a text. It’s from my ex. It’s a 13 minute long video of him setting fire to everything I left there, with gasoline and everything. Petty bastard.
I don’t know if this is exactly petty but my ex convinced me to go on vacation with him, got me to contribute $150 for “my share” of the hotel and then broke up with me a week later and took another girl he’d been cheating on me with. Again, don’t know if this is petty but definitely a dick move.
I wanted to be married on The Day of the Dead so I’d feel like my father was there. He always thought that was nice and we agreed on that. After we broke up he married someone else. Guess what day they got married? Yeah, The Day of the Dead.
My acting major ex WROTE and PERFORMED a monologue for class in which he described in explicit, gory detail how he cheated on me multiple times and how much he enjoyed it. Apparently it was so vulgar that, when he was finished, a girl said, ‘You really shouldn’t be allowed to talk to women.'”