2017 has been a pretty awful year all around. From a celebrity taking over our country, multiple women letting us know they have been sexually assaulted and harassed and just about all of our bad days combined into one – it sucks. 2017 will definitely go down in history as one of those “wish we skipped it” type of years. But, while we sit and look back on our bad days this year, we’re here to share some other people’s awful, no good, very bad encounters this year to make you feel just a bit better about your own awful life.
1. This horrible sexual encounter:
An ex thought he was gods gift to sex. When going down, he’d try to use his tongue like a dick. No clit play at all, which did nothing for me whatsoever. He also had a micropenis, which wouldn’t have been a problem if he didn’t finish in under 3mins every time.
2. This bride’s worst nightmare:
I had severe diarrhea during my wedding. My husband was reading his vows, and all of a sudden liquid crap started flowing out of me. My wedding dress had a long tail, and the crap caught the tail. When I finally ran off to get changed 20 minutes later, the tail left a streak of crap all over the ground.
3. This tragic breakup:
In May my ex-boyfriend broke up with me 48ish hours before we were due to go to Walt Disney World. It was by text message while I was at work. After I got back we decided to work on things. He lied and told me we had broken up because he was depressed. Two weeks of working on things goes by, he blocks every way of contacting him and said that I wasn’t even worth it.
4. This no good, very bad day:
Had just broken up with my girlfriend, was in the middle of a 3 day episode of kidney stones and going through awful spasms every couple hours, my 17 year old dog got very sick and sicker over the last week and I had to put him down and I knew I had waited way too long and knew in the end I had failed him.
5. This guy’s unfortunate wedding photo:
OK SO DID I DO SOMETHING TO OFFEND THE WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER? pic.twitter.com/Fc041Bofkk
— Mike T (@rhymeswithbeg) November 11, 2017