10 Ways To Make Sure Your Relationship Lasts For The Long Haul

I’m going to be honest with you: relationships are hard work. You have to work hard to get the future that you and your partner want, or else it’ll slip away. I’ve been with my boyfriend for over 2 years now, and let me tell you, we’ve been through literally everything. We learned early on in our relationship that happiness wouldn’t always come so easily to us – it’s something that we have to work together to find and trust me, we’ve been working our asses off for it. Things happen in every relationship that can easily lead to a breakup but you and your partner have to make the conscious decision to fight through everything that comes your way and I honestly think that that’s the first step into making your relationship last. That, on top of these 10 other tips, are my (clearly professional, marriage-counselor level) ways to make sure your relationship lasts. Totally kidding about the professional marriage counselor claim, read at your own risk. That’s all. You’re welcome.

1. Be honest with each other.

It takes more effort to lie than it does, to tell the truth. Always tell your partner how you feel, and tell them without hiding anything. Being dishonest with someone that you love creates a bigger problem- especially when they find out. It ruins trust and it could potentially ruin a relationship. This point is pretty common sense, but it’s super important in making sure your relationship lasts.

2. Don’t hold grudges.

Holding grudges not only hurts the person you’re holding them against, but it also hurts you. It takes a lot of energy to stay mad at past issues and it’s honestly so draining. Don’t bring up old fights in current arguments, and don’t hold past mistakes against your significant other- it doesn’t solve any current issues, it blows everything else up for no reason. If you’re still upset over something that happened in the past, talk about it and solve it with your significant other, but don’t let it hurt you more than it needs to.

3. Don’t fight to have the last word.

This is something my dad always told me. He said never to fight for the last word in an argument because it’s not worth it. You’re both just going to keep fighting and fighting and nothing will get resolved, and he’s right. Constantly needing to get the last word in is petty, and it doesn’t solve anything- it only makes things worse because instead of dealing with the issue at hand in your relationship, you’re both getting more heated trying to be the last person speaking and that leads to one, or both of you saying something you don’t mean. Just accept that there’s an issue or disagreement, talk it over, apologize, and love each other again.

4. Don’t go to sleep angry with each other.

This is something that I believe in and stands by so fully in my relationship. I cannot deal with going to sleep angry with my boyfriend. It makes for a really bad night’s sleep and leaves me waking up in the morning feeling worse. I’d rather just solve our issues before we go to sleep because it means that you spend less time stewing in anger and negative vibes. I know that not all couples can do this, but if it’s possible, try it. It obviously feels so much better ending the day and falling asleep on good terms with your significant other, so why carry negativity over onto another day?

5. Keep things interesting.

This doesn’t have to be extreme at all. You can do little things here and there with your significant other to take yourselves out of your normal routines and make time for each other. Every so often my boyfriend will take me on a little day trip to explore another city and it’s so nice to get out of our hometown and adventure somewhere else- it doesn’t have to cost a lot of money, we always find ourselves sitting in cafes in other cities drinking coffee and people-watching.