These Roommate Horror Stories Will Make Your Roomie Complaints Look Like Child’s Play

We all have unfortunate ex-roommate stories. If we didn’t, those same people would probably still be our roommates. We’ve heard them stumbling in drunk at 3 AM, we’ve passive aggressively reminded them that it’s their turn to do the dishes, and we’ve held our tongue when they cook ridiculously stinky food in the kitchen. However, all of those grievances pale in comparison to truly horrible roommate stories — like the ones shared in a recent Twitter thread.

The roommate horror stories started when journalist Gene Demby shared a link to an article about Jamison Bachman, a man with a law degree who would move in with Craigslist roommates, become a squatter, and then force them out through his painstaking knowledge of tenancy laws.

This particular roommate-from-hell story prompted Demby to ask his followers about their own terrible roommate stories (Demby even included an anecdote about one of his own roommates, who had been collecting the rent money and using it to pay his cult dues).

Needless to say, the responses were so preposterously bad that they made the typical complaints (i.e., dirty dishes left in the sink, loud music, noisy sex) look peachy keen.

One guy’s roommate apparently had the world’s weirdest Nutella fixation.

One roommate/landlady stole her tenant’s passport (and took away her access to clean clothes).

There was a roommate who thought they could get away with having a monster under their bed.

A girl was once held as a party hostage by her roommate.

There was the roommate who thought having weird pets would be “fun.”

One woman’s roommate decided to fight for her right to orgy.

One guy’s roommate just didn’t understand oral hygiene … or boundaries.

There was one roommate who was something of an exhibitionist.

One girl’s roomie was really reaching with this excuse for moving out.

This girl’s roommate had a littering problem … among other things.

One roommate needed to get some better hobbies.

This woman’s roommate thought she was going to give birth to a watermelon child.

And one guy couldn’t believe his roommate kept killing his pets …

… even though HE was obviously the nightmarish roommate in this scenario.

I don’t know, guys. From this perspective, a person who’s occasionally late on paying their share of utilities isn’t looking so bad …