Guilty Parents Admit The Outright Lies They’ve Told Their Children

Santa Needs a Brew

My dad used to tell me Santa was tired of cookies and milk, I’d get extra toys if I left Doritos and a beer. That went on for years.

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Watch That Word Count!

People get 10,000 words per month. If you reach the limit you can’t physically speak until the new month begins. Anytime I was especially talkative, Dad would say, “Careful now, I have to think you are up over 9,000 by now.” That would shut me right up.

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Prepare for Takeoff

My dada told me that pushing the seat recline button on an airplane helps the plane take off, and that if not enough people push it the plane would crash.

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