11. If you must steal might as well make it an exotic import.
Is this person now technically considered an international criminal? They’re at home with his unmatched tea collection with the most exotic teas from the furthest corners of the world. Must be an awesome conversation starter. What a cultured workplace thief.
12. This is “borrowing”. I’m still “borrowing” friends clothes.
3 years is well under the statute of limitations of borrowing. I’ve been continuously borrowing siblings and friends clothes for longer than these measly 3 years. Did I steal their clothes? Absolutely 100% no chance. Have they been in my closet for almost 5 years? Absolutely 100% very possibly.
13. 100% chance this was single ply, ouch.
There are some things you just do not skimp on. Toilet paper is very, very high on that list. I understand having a long day at work. I understand not wanting to run errands after you are finally free but let me tell you this. You are doing yourself no favors here! You need to pull it together get that weak nonsense out of your house and double down, friend.
14. This is not stealing. This is surviving.
This makes me want to find this person’s venmo and shoot them a few bucks. It spoke to me spiritually, I’ve been there. Have your friend distract the person from Wendy’s so you can fill your bag up with as many salts, pepper, and ketchup packets you can. The struggle is real! Believe me when I say there is a light and bottled condiments at the end of the tunnel. Just hold on.
15. Some people just want to watch the world burn.
This person needs to be locked up and the key needs to be thrown away immediately. Do we have any open rooms at Guantanamo Bay? I will not sleep soundly until this type of evil is erased from our society. Somebody really needs to take a stand.
16. Does roommate know they live with a cold-blooded thief?
A little nervous about this roommate duo we got here. We got the work thief and the one who loves labeling things, interesting. Now, I can appreciate a good labeling but would I consider it something I love to do? No. Maybe the roommate is just mad woke and has realized they live with a klepto and is taking precautions.
17. No crime here. Just Robin Hood for our feline friends.
If there is a kitten in need of some food you get that kitten food by any means necessary! This can’t be considered a crime in any land am I right? This person is much closer to superhero in my opinion than a criminal. Maybe this is the hero we’ve all been waiting for? Either way, keep it up! You feline feeding vigilante, we salute you.
18. Risking your job for video game comfort. Bold strategy.
19. I don’t know one human who could resist that temptation.
I was unaware humans had the ability to fight off Oreo urges. I’ve done an extensive amount of scientific research to support this. Many times I’ve not been very hungry I’ll see that blue bag peeking at me. Okay, I’ll just have one. Then all of a sudden I blacked out. I wake up an hour later with oreo cookie crumbs on me a stomach ache and an empty box to keep my regret. Oreos do weird things to people, man.
20. This makes them the reverse Grinch, right?
The Grinch stole the Christmas tree so nobody could celebrate the amazing holiday. This person is so excited for Christmas he’s stealing for it months in advance. I’m not sure if I admire this person holiday spirit or just consider them a complete lunatic. It depends on the tree I guess. Everyone wants to have the best Christmas tree, I can definitely relate to you there just maybe buy it next time?