As a person of refinement, taste, and an agile wit, you probably already follow Mike Primavera on Twitter. If you don’t, you’re missing out, because he’s hilarious. Check out some of the funniest things Primavera (yes, that’s his real name) has ever said apart from his work on The Onion, Clickhole, and Someecards.
Every one of Johnny Depp's scarves is from a magician he's killed.
— Mike Primavera (@primawesome) March 28, 2015
Wait what do you mean Jesus loves me? Did he say something to you? OMG I'm freaking out right now tell me his exact words.
— Mike Primavera (@primawesome) December 4, 2013
I'm at my most desperate when food comes but it's too hot to eat.
— Mike Primavera (@primawesome) January 6, 2016