Get that lift in:
“When eating Chinese food, you should pick up your bowl. I often see Westerners leaving their bowl on the table (because that is Western etiquette) and precariously lifting five grains of rice at a time all the way to their mouth with their chopsticks. It is painful to watch.”
Change up:
“Fries. They should be eaten with mayonnaise, not ketchup. Hamburgers with ketchup, not mayonnaise.”
Lies:
“Fortune cookies in Chinese restaurant. In China, we DO NOT eat them.”
Chill with the MSG.
“I honestly don’t think in casual dining there are many right and wrong ways to consume a food. I might say some are more customary than others, like fries eaten with your fingers and dunked in ketchup, but I don’t like getting my hands greasy, so I use a fork and like to dunk in tartar sauce if it’s available. I think the ugliest things things I’ve seen are people dousing their entire plate with salt or soy sauce before tasting and people putting ketchup on literally everything.”
Do what you wish ladies and gents.
“If it is food, and you are happy to eat the food, and it gives you sustenance or pleasure, then you are eating it the right way.”