When you have to deliver 100 pizza but meet your girlfriend’s parents in 10:
“Last summer I took up a job delivering pizza. During the year, I spend most of my free time at school, and working an internship for a museum in Philadelphia. I needed cash for some new Egyptology textbooks, and FAST. On my first day of the job, I had to deliver not 5….not 10…not 50….but 100 whole pizzas. I had just received my permit a week prior, and I barely knew how to drive. My girlfriend Morgan called me and said that she wanted me to meet her parents.
One problem…They had just recently come back from a golfing tournament in Ireland, and there was no food. So you know what? I said screw it, and I took the pizzas to Morgan’s house. I had a lovely pizza dinner with Morgan, and Morgan’s parents. We went through three boxes. The following day when I clocked in at work, my boss Mario confronted me, and he was FURIOUS.”
Cheese, please!
“Hey, I saw the pizza made. I’m not going to eat that. I was known to snarf some mozarella, though, when assigned to slice it up. Best mozarella I ever had. And they never assigned me to cheese slicing again.”
There is just no need to do that.
“I have and will never do that. Why would I? I get a free pizza of my choosing when I clock out, plus tips from the complete deliveries I’d made through the evening.”
It’s just not your food to eat.
“When It’s just one kind of food I imagine you get tired of eating it. You probably have your own way of doctoring it to your liking. So a customer’s food wouldn’t really be what you want.”
You could eat the pizza in place of a tip.
“The closest I came was when a customer ordered two pizzas but when I got there they only had money to pay for one and not even money for a tip. When I would not leave it they got mad and said “Since you are going to have to throw away the one we can not pay for away anyway why not just give it to us?” I told them that would only encourage them to do it again. When they kept asking what I was going to do with it, I opened up the box pulled out a slice and bit into it saying, “Eat it myself as my tip!”