the chicken in my wife's spicy chicken burger was bigger than the bun while mine was smaller and I know ill bring it up in a future argument
— brent (@murrman5) August 27, 2017
For the first time in 16 years, I remembered where we keep the tape without having to ask my wife, so our marriage is going well right now.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) November 21, 2017
Wife: *asks question*
Me: *gives answer*
Wife: I’m looking it up on the internet…
— Boyd's Backyard™ (@TheBoydP) November 20, 2017
Me – You almost ready?
Wife – Just a few more minutes. What time do we have to be there?
Me – Yesterday at 7.
— Dan R (@Social_Mime) June 21, 2017
Establish dominance in your household by staring at your husband while you unplug his phone from the charger and plug in your own.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) November 23, 2017