I hate cutting my hair, I hang out with 7 guys, I have a sleeping disorder and I have a thing for shoes and fishnets. I blame Disney.
— Niki (@NikiWithIssues) October 21, 2011
me: "why was she called the little mermaid, she was 5ft7?"
therapist: "i meant anything bothering you about your marriage keith"
— k e i t h ?? (@KeetPotato) February 27, 2016
Aladdin and Jasmine totally fuck on that magic carpet right? Trying to settle a bet.
— Kumail Nanjiani (@kumailn) March 6, 2015