i would describe my winter look as “a thin grandfather about to tell a story to a child on Christmas Eve”
— audrey farnsworth (@audipenny) December 8, 2017
If my Facebook Year in Review video were honest, it’d just be quick cuts of me screaming and using the word “fuck” as various parts of speech.
— shauna (@goldengateblond) December 7, 2017
Wanna know if you are whipped by your three year old toddler? Ask yourself one question… Do you put ice cubes in his water bottle?
— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) December 4, 2017
Just got into the Christmas spirit by remembering how cool Joseph was about an invisible guy impregnating his lady Mary.
— kelly oxford (@kellyoxford) December 8, 2017
Can girls stop saying all we need is like chicken nuggets and a hug like speak for yourself you weird bitch
— gabby (@gabrieellaelise) November 13, 2017