Every time I come across an Instagram post of a couple with the #RelationshipGoals, I actually contemplate reporting the posts for spam. Believing that there is such a thing as “Relationship Goals,” or a “Perfect Relationship,” is some serious bullsh*t and honestly, it’s the real reason why you are never going to be happy in your own relationship.
There is no such thing as a perfect person, celebrities, and teen heartthrobs aside; no one is perfect. You’re not perfect, I’m not perfect, and no one we are ever in a relationship with is going to be perfect. So explain to me how do “Perfect Relationships,” come to be?
The couples you see all over Instagram, posting photos of them traveling the world, doing all these fun and exotic things together all the day; really don’t have as perfect of a relationship as you think.
Have you ever noticed that no one ever posts anything bad on Instagram? You’ll never see someone post about the job they didn’t get, but, they will post about the job that they did. You never see people post about how they are struggling to make a living, but you’ll see posts of all the flashy new things they’ve obtained. You don’t see posts on the struggles people face every day, but you’ll see the posts of people out and about making it seem like they are having the time of their lives.
And maybe they are.
But the reality is that you’re not going to ever post about the big fight you and your significant other had that ended in a lot of tears and pain. You are going to posts all of the photos of you on vacation together seeming like you have a perfect relationship.
If you keep comparing yourself to something that isn’t even real, you are never going to be satisfied with your relationship. If you are spending so much time focusing on having your relationship be like someone else’s, you’re going to lose touch with what your relationship really is. And it probably is a lot better and more of a real relationship than the one you are comparing yourself too.
You will never be satisfied, ever, if you continue to compare yourself to someone else’s relationship.
It is so important to realize that all of those couples that seem perfect, are only showing you one side of their relationship. It is not all that perfect, and it is so important to understand that before you start heading down the downward spiral of being unsatisfied and sabotaging your own love.
Yes, we all want people to look up to us and be jealous of what we have. It’s tempting to want to be a perfect social media couple and one that everyone wants to be in. Honestly though, what is the point of that? Why would you want someone else to want your relationship instead of you?
Instead of striving to find the “Perfect Relationship,” or the #RelationshipGoals, strive to find someone that is perfect for you. Find a relationship where the person you are with accepts you for who you are. They accept that you are crazy, constantly on the go, how you look when you first wake up in the morning, the attitude that you have, and all your flaws.
Fighting, when done in moderation and non aggressively, is healthy for a relationship. At the end of the day, you are you, and your significant other is also their own person; you aren’t going to agree on everything.
That is not a perfect relationship, but a real relationship.
A relationship where you can fight and then kiss and make up. A relationship where you aren’t perfect but, you know you are loved for who you are. A relationship where you aren’t perfect together and you aren’t perfect apart, but you are perfect for each other because of how you feel for each other.