33 Thoughts Everyone Has While Stalking Their Ex On Social Media

Stalking your ex on social media basically becomes part of your morning routine after a breakup. I know I’ve been guilty of going a little too deep on exes social media. Apparently, I’m in good company because 70% of people stalk their exes on social media, according to Dr. Suzana E. Flores, a clinical psychologist and author of Facehooked: How Facebook Affects Our Emotions, Relationships, and Our Lives. If you’re one of the few ~healthy~ people who are able to cut the cord and delete your ex after a breakup, I don’t know you.

Everyone I know does even if they don’t want to admit it, which is totally understandable. No one wants to be the person keeping tabs on their ex, but we are those people. I am that person. Here’s how it usually goes down when I find myself creeping into that black hole of no return.

1 . Oh, I’m just going to the discover page on Instagram to see some fitness inspo so I can will myself to go to the gym.

2. Wait, my ex’s name is right there. This is definitely not because I recently checked out his Instagram. It’s right there! How can I not click just to see if he posted anything new?

3. My finger slipped and now I have to see his feed. This is just for fun! No big deal!

4. Let’s just see who all 47 people who decided to “like” his latest selfie are. I’m just wondering!

5. Ugh, I hated how often he posted selfies. It’s gross! He’s such a narcissist.

6. Wait … this girl has been liking a lot of his pictures.

7. Not just a lot. She’s liked every. single. one.

8. Who is this girl?

9. I mean, I’ve come this far and may as well find out who this girl who seems to be so obsessed with him is.

The first picture you see is your ex and her together at a pumpkin patch with the #iloveourfamily and #couplegoals. You vom a little, but you must soldier on. We need to find out everything about this girl. Is she smart? Did she go to school? WHAT IS HER MOTHER’S NAME? This is the part where you find yourself 97 weeks deep in a girl’s feed wondering where you went wrong in life.

10. Oh wait, I recognize this place … that’s where he works.