13 Of The Best F***ing Deals On Amazon Today

We get it: you don’t have the time or patience to poke around Amazon all day looking for cool stuff to buy. Thing is, we do! So we scrolled through endless garbage to find the coolest stuff and bring it right to your screen. Thank us later. Or now! Thank us whenever you want.

Full disclosure:We may receivesome portion of the sales made on this list. We’re using the money to build a louder motorcycle. They just aren’t loud enough.

1. Some ravioli oven mitts.

You are not required to use them exclusively on ravioli pots, but you totally can.

Check ’em out here!

2. This gentlemanly sponge holder.

So at least someone in this apartment is holding a sponge, RIGHT KATE?

Check it out here!

3. This awesome clock.

So now checking the time will count as reading. Win!

Check it out here!

4. This slick speaker.

Looks like a purse, parties like a freshman.

Check it out here!

5. This zen dip tray.

Dipping is a very spiritual experience, if you do it right.

Check it out here!

6. This plush heart!

Give it to someone so they have your heart. Then take it back when you need something to throw at them.

Check it out here!

7. A Halloween doggo.

Doin a vv good spook.

Check it out here!

8. Darth Vader socks!

I find your lack of shoes disturbing.

Check it out here!

9. This pillow that expresses your inner thoughts.

All the time. That’s the only thing I’m ever thinking.

Check it out here!

10. This kitty toilet brush.

So cute you’ll forget it’s a toilet brush! Which is what we’re all trying to do.

Check it out here!

11. Mr Pumice.

Mr. Pumice is my father. Please, call me Jeff.

Check it out here!

12. This helpful camping guide.

For camping and/or glamping.

Check it out here!

13. A portable espresso holder.

Also for camping. Or jogging. Or going up into space. (Idk, astronauts could be reading this.)

Check it out here.