When you’re in a relationship, you’re giving your word to someone that you will be honest, loyal, and true. You are with that person because you love, support, and admire them enough to spend your life with them—or, at least a significant part of your life with them. They are your “home.” The person you want to tell everything to, the person you want to call when the good things happen—and the bad. The one you text immediately when you receive that promotion, or when you get an A on your final, or when you discover a new song that completely changes your mood. Your significant other should be your person, and the one you want to share it all with.
So often today with technology, social media, and dating apps, we find it easier more than ever to connect with anyone in the world. While it’s easier to communicate with people, it also causes many people to stray away from the one they love. Now, I’m not saying that everyone who uses technology is a cheater, but what I am saying is that technology makes it easier to connect with someone than ever before.
Before cell phones, texting, and social media, you had to go out and meet people in order to bond with them. And, no one would really go out looking for something if they had someone at home. But, with texting being so effortless, many people in relationships see no problem with having casual conversations with other people.
In the short term, no, texting isn’t horrible. But, the more you do it, the more you sometimes become emotionally connected to someone outside of your relationship. I’m not saying that texting anyone is cheating—guys are entitled to have friends who are female while in a relationship. But, the minute you start to look outside of your relationship for that emotional fulfillment you once found in your relationship—that’s a red flag.
Susan J Elliott, the author of “Getting Back Out There,” says that your relationship should be the place where you find comfort and peace—not some other person.
“Everyone has the right to go to sleep at night and not worry that their partner is in the next room playing virtual footsie with some internet hottie.”
If you’re texting someone that you are hiding from your girlfriend, that’s emotional cheating. If you’re having conversations with someone else that you feel you can’t have with your girlfriend—that’s a problem. You should feel comfortable enough to talk to your significant other about anything, and, if you don’t, you need to look inside of your relationship and reevaluate where you stand.
Emotionally investing in someone else is cheating. Just because you haven’t had physical contact with another person doesn’t mean that you haven’t put things in them—verbally. You confiding in someone else, sneaking around to talk to someone else, and opening up to someone else is cheating. It’s hurtful, it’s disloyal, and it’s lying.
You’re better off breaking up with your partner than living a double life.