Me: where does milk come from? Nephew: cows, duh Me: what about chocolate milk? Nephew: from brown cows Me: strawberry milk? Nephew: from strawberry cows Me: what about banana milk? Nephew: from bananas
From my then 4-year old daughter: “Why do they call them ‘onion rings’? They should be called ‘onion bracelets’.”
Not mine but a friends kid. Walking around local supermarket and kid sees (what I presume is for the first time) a person in a wheelchair.
Kid gets super excited, shouting to his dad, “DADDY, LOOK THAT MANS A CAR!”
My 5yr old neighbor rang my doorbell. I opened the door and he said: “Mom says I shouldn’t ask for cookies”.
Clever little dude. Got him a cookie.
My son was excited to start school and learn to read just like his big brother. So first day is over and I ask him how it went. He started crying, I’m like oh no baby what’s wrong? Son: I didn’t learn to read yet. He thought he would instantly know how just from starting school, he was so bloody disappointed. I couldn’t stop laughing.
Me: Do you know what a lie is?
6-year-old: It’s when you say something that isn’t true, and you get caught.
I feel a career in politics beckons…
When my sister was little she saw a boy pee. So, next time she had to go, she stood in front of the toilet, dropped her pants, and tried to do the same except obviously it just went straight down. Then she ran to mom/dad very afraid and said that the neighbors dog must have bit hers off, and asked if they could make her a new one
I went to school yesterday (first day), why do I need to go again?
My cousin believed that when you’re pregnant, the baby’s body lives in the bump and the baby’s head is inside your boob. When asked why ladies have two boobies then, she instantly replied ‘In case it’s twins, silly!’
When i was very pregnant with my son, a little girl (maybe 5 or 6) came up to my husband and i and very sternly said, “Are you married?” We said we were and she goes, “Good. Because if you arent married, you get to keep that baby but then you have to get spay-ded and neutered because we dont need anymore strays.”