5. They Are Exceedingly Impulsive And Unpredictable
Studies have found that impulsivity highly correlates to instances of child abuse and neglect. While your partner’s inability to control a sudden urge to splurge does not necessarily mean they will be an abusive parent, that sort of instinctual weakness may bode poorly for you if a reliable co-parent is what you seek. Furthermore, an unpredictable lifestyle sets an unstable foundation for a healthy family dynamic. Is your partner constantly getting into trouble, losing their job, making completely unanticipated job changes, etc.? Consider your life if a child is thrown in the mix and remember that children raised in unstable homes experience worse developmental outcomes than those who are not.
6. They Have Toxic Habits They Aren’t Working On Changing
Everyone has bad habits, but if you and your SO are constantly fighting (and you often feel stonewalled and/or gaslighted) or if they are still frequently binge drinking, doing drugs, and generally only “playing hard” without the “working hard”, I’d strongly suggest not mixing your DNA with theirs.
7. They Suck At Responsibility
If your partner regularly forgets to feed or walk the dog, doesn’t show up to job interviews, can’t keep a plant or pet fish alive, and generally doesn’t do what they say they are going to do— not only should you not have a kid with this person, you should run like hell. When one person isn’t carrying their weight in a relationship, it all falls on person #2. This may be merely frustrating if you’re just dating, but if you are trying to raise a kid together it is hell on earth.