We get it: you don’t have the time or patience to poke around Amazon all day looking for cool stuff to buy. Thing is, we do! So we scrolled through endless garbage to find the coolest stuff and bring it right to your screen. Thank us later. Or now! Thank us whenever you want.
Full disclosure: We may receive some portion of the sales made on this list. But don’t worry, we don’t really believe in money.
1. Possibly the greatest shirt of all time.
Pizza. Cats. Space. Taco. This is you all over.
Check it out here!
2. Salt and pepper shakers shaped like cupcakes.
Sweet and salty: the only two life forces that anyone needs.
Check it out here!
3. This USB drive shaped like sushi.
So you can store all your sushi-related files in one place.
Check it out here!
4. These bowls are the droids you’re looking for.
Just don’t forget to wipe their memory drives when you’re done.
Check ’em out here!
5. This watermelon plush is too f***ing cute.
So cute you’ll feel bad for salivating all over it when thinking about watermelon.
Check it out here!
6. This mug comes with free motivation.
Because your coworkers sure as hell aren’t gonna give it to you. Especially Janet.
Check it out here!
7. A taco cheese grater.
To grate all your taco cheese. Or any kind of cheese. More cheese!
Check it out here!
8. This stuffed narwhal is great to throw at things.
The wall, the bed, your boyfriend. Whatever’s pissing you off this morning and last night and probably tomorrow.
Check it out here!
9. A collapsible water bottle to save space.
Because your bag is already a time and space-bending black hole where wallets and lipstick disappear into the ether.
Check it out here!
10. This Spartan knife holder is f***ing epic.
And will remind you of the last time you masturbated to the movie 300. Oh yeah like that was just me.
Check it out here!
11. This mini espresso kit is for emergencies only.
Emergencies like 2pm on a Tuesday. Or 4pm on a Thursday.
Check it out here!
12. This canvas bag is me.
It is you. It is all of us right now.
Check it out here!
13. This succulent planter will bring life to any space.
Plus succulent’s are super easy. You (proooobbbbably) won’t kill them immediately.
Check it out here!
14. Pot holders shaped like crab claws!
So you can finally live out your dream of being a crab.
Check it out here!
15. A whole buncha matcha.
Matcha makes everything better. Except matcha. Although, it’s worth trying.
Check it out here!
16. Finally, some avocado socks.
Because avocado needs to be on everything. Including your feet.
Check ’em out here!