When you start falling for someone, there’s a lot of emotions that are involved. You start off being smooth, calm and collected, trying to win over the person’s attention. Eventually, when you score some time with them, you get nervous and flustered – unsure how to act or even speak. There are plenty of times in our lives where we have acted like a complete fool in front of those we’re trying to impress – but, for a good reason. When we find ourselves completely into someone – it’s almost difficult for us to be “normal.” You know – we act like an idiot because we want to impress them, but, we end up falling on our faces.
1. He clams up:
We’ve all been there where we forget the English language when speaking. Guys who are into you may stutter on their words, look a bit tense – even blush several times mid-conversation. Girls will interpret these signs negatively – as the guy is “stupid,” or even “weird.” But, don’t be fooled by his nerves – often times, the nervous ones are the keepers. Do you really want to date the guy who is utterly brilliant and stone-cold confident every time? Take it from experience – that guy is the “ladies’ man.”
2. He won’t stop talking about himself:
On the first few dates when you’re getting to know someone, they’re going to talk about themselves a whole lot. But, it shouldn’t be their show and they have the mic the entire time. If a guy is too busy talking about himself to get to know you – it can be a major turn off. But, don’t be fooled, he wants to do this so you can understand him better – sell you on the idea of dating him. He does it to get you interested not turn you away.
3. He acts like a complete macho jackass:
Some guys think that showing off their “manliness” will woo any female – but, we’re not all into muscles and ego. In fact, I think it’s unattractive when a guy tries to flex really hard on the first few dates. While I’m turned off – guys are usually doing it to try and make us see they care about their appearance and how they look – which, is a nice and all – but, I’d rather you care about toning down your ego, too.
4. He starts bragging about other women he’s bedded:
Guys want you to know that they have “options” because they want you to feel as though you’re making a good choice in dating them – as in, other women want me too, so you should want me. But, this makes him look pathetic and insecure – I’m not interested in how many women you’ve slept with and in fact, it makes me question your emotional stability and if you have some serious Mommy issues.
5. He negs:
Negging is defined as a “back handed compliment,” which really, is just an insult. Like – “this haircut makes your face look thinner,” or, “that dress hides your love handles so well.” It’s supposed to be a compliment, but, in reality, it just makes you feel even worse about yourself. There’s no denying that he’s trying to break you down – regardless of why – it’s wrong.
6. He goes into verbal vomit mode:
Much like the guy who stutters and sweats, a guy who is nervous may start to ramble on and on about things that are…random. A guy who is extremely nervous may just keep talking to keep the conversation going – because, you know what they say about good conversations on dates. Help him out – give him a life line. If he’s busy babbling like an idiot, jump in and take over. Don’t let him drown.
7. He stops taking no for an answer:
In rom-coms, the guy who never takes “no” for an answer seems romantic – but in real life, they’re egotistical and rude. If you tell someone no and they do not accept that answer – make damn well sure they understand you. No means no, always. You do not want to be with someone nor date someone who cannot understand that concept. It’s vital.
8. He gets crazy sexual:
There are guys who think sex is everything in a relationship – so they start out being pretty sexual from the start. But, this shows that they only value sex and not who you are as a person. If a guy jumps to sexual intercourse before they get to know who you are – they’re interested in your body and not your mind. It’s hard to say no to someone when you’re attracted to them, but, don’t sell yourself short.
9. He plays “intellectual jackass”:
We all want to date someone who is smart – but not someone who is so cocky about it that they make us feel dumb. A guy will try to “flex his mind” sometimes to impress a girl, but neglects to see that it insults us. While we love that they’re smart, we hate that they think we’re dumber than them.
10. He acts way too dominant:
Guys who act too controlling come off as crazy and stressful. No girl wants to date someone who acts like her father – be sure to steer clear of the guys who try to control every aspect of your life. On the first few dates, if he’s ordering for you – it’s not romantic, it’s a bit of a red flag.
11. He starts badmouthing himself:
The insecure guy will put himself down to make him seem more “normal” or human – or, he actually does feel really bad about himself. Try and mak him feel more comfortable and avoid converastions like that – or, ask him to stop bashing himself altogether. We’re all insecure about certain things, but on the first few dates it’s almost too much.
12. He goes full meltdown:
A guy who likes a girl way too much and is not prepared for dating will go into full meltdown mode – but it’s rare. He may have a panic attack, throw up, ask to leave early – even cry. This guy is definitely not ready for a relationship and needs a bit more time to get himself together.
This post was originally published on YourTango.