1. This ostrich pillow that lets you hide your head in the “sand” and make them all go away.
Get it for $99.
2. This framed cross-stitch is great to look at after a long day at the office..
Get it on Etsy.
3. A pin for your backpack.
Get it for $12.
4. Pencils for when you just can’t deal with people today.
Get a pack on Amazon for $9.
5. This scarf to keep you warm as well as keep everyone else away.
Get one on Amazon for $26.
6. This hoodie for someone who’d rather be abducted by aliens than talk to “hoomans.”
Get it on RedBubble for $50.
7. A tent to turn your bed into human-free zone.
Get it on Amazon for $130.
8. A tote for anyone who realizes dogs are better than people.
Get it on Society6 for $20.
9. A bottle opener made for drinking alone, which is totally OK by the way. Don’t let anyone judge you.
Get it on Amazon for $10.
10. A laptop sticker to help you avoid small talk when you’re surfing the web in a coffee shop.
Get it of Society6 for $25.
11. This graphic tee to gesture to let people know when they’re getting too close.
Get it on Society6 for $21.99.
12. And this mug featuring a plant who’s as antisocial as you are.
Get it on Amazon for $12.
13 This giant bear body pillow for those times when you actually want to cuddle with something, but people just aren’t going to do the trick.
Get it from Plow & Hearth for $79.95.
14. A custom-print onesie that just screams “GO AWAY.”
Get one custom made on Beloved for $160.
15. This escape pod.
Get it for a mere $2700.00.
16. This mug that’ll tell people exactly how you feel.
Get it from LookHuman for $16.
17. This shirt for when you do have to interact with people, but want them to know you’re not enjoying it.
Get it from LookHuman for $19.99.
To be clear we may receive a portion of the sales from these items, but even if we didn’t we’d still recommend them. They’re awesome.