Woman’s Visual Art Explaining The Stages Of Grief May Help You Cope With Your Own Loss

It’s no secret that grief and coping with losing a loved one is hard as hell. No matter when we lose someone, or how we lose someone, dealing with grief is inevitably difficult. For many, it’s almost impossible to continuously deal with grief on an everyday basis—espeically when we lose someone we never imagined living life without.

For me, losing my father was almost impossible to overcome. Six years later, I still get hit with days where I can’t stop crying or missing him. There are times when I still think, “Damn, I really wish I could call him right now to tell him XY and Z.” Finishing my Master’s degree, I feel a special kind of grief, wishing I could see his face when I accept my diploma. And, I know I’m not alone in feeling this way. There are billions of people all across the world that share my pain.

Twitter user Lauren Herschel came up with a deep, insightful way to visualize grief by using an analogy that includes a box and a ball. In all honesty, it makes absolutely perfect sense for anyone who is dealing with grief on a regular basis.

Herschel said that she was told the analogy by a doctor while dealing with the loss of her mother. She had seen a woman in a store that reminded her of her grandmother and immediately began thinking of her mother, again.

The analogy includes a box, a ball, and a pain button.

In the beginning, when we first lose someone, Herschel says the ball is “huge.” Therefore, you can’t move the box without the ball hitting the pain button. It seems as though it’s permanently stuck on the pain button no matter what you do.

Over time, however, the ball gets smaller and smaller. Therefore, the pain button gets hit less and less. Yet, when it does hit the pain button, it hurts just as much as it did in the beginning—it’s just less frequent.

Herschel added that for most people, the ball never goes away. However, as it hits the pain button less frequently, you have more time to recover in between.

She also shared that some people find it comforting to have a way to verbalize their grief, sharing that her stepdad uses it to describe how he is feeling.

Many people online were grateful that Herschel shared the analogy, giving them a sense of comfort and hope to know they have a way to verbalize their own pain—and, that they’re not alone.

Thank you, Lauren. And, to all those who are feeling it—your ball will get smaller.