4.
do any couples want to take me apple picking this year? I am a sturdy third wheel with good eye for apples, will stare at the sun while you kiss, can fit in most trunks
— Sarah Lazarus (@sarahclazarus) September 11, 2018
3.
name a more iconic duo than me and my insatiable thirst for dumb bitch juice pic.twitter.com/WYjshSbi8J
— rach orange county (@asapfig) September 5, 2018
2.
Can someone Venmo me a last nerve?
— Avengers’ Funeral Coordinator (@Steph_I_Will) September 11, 2018
1.
“I just spilled coffee on my blouse” I said to coworker and I don’t know if I’m more upset by the spilling of coffee or that I called my shirt a blouse.
— EnvyDaTropic™ (@envydatropic) September 14, 2018