9.
OTHER MOMS: i miss my kids while they're at school during the day
ME: by Monday morning I'm ready to launch my kids to school with one of those medieval catapult thingies
— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) April 9, 2018
8.
A recent study says to wash new clothes before you wear them bc they could contain fecal germs which is funny bc I have kids so pretty much everything around me already contains fecal germs.
— MyQuestionableLife (@2questionable) April 19, 2018
7.
[laying in bed]
Husband: Good morning
Me: Good morning
All 3 children sitting on top of my head: Good morning!!
— MacgyveringMom (@MacgyveringM22) April 7, 2018
6.
Me: I should go to bed early tonight.
Me to me: Eff that! It’s your kid free time. Binge watch shows, eat junk food & hate yourself tomorrow! pic.twitter.com/jS1yXufiLe
— Real American Dadass (@R_A_Dadass) April 9, 2018
5.
Wheel of Fortune but the spot you land on determines what you'll be arguing about with your kids that morning. Today I got "Shoes."
— Rodney Lacroix (@moooooog35) April 10, 2018
4.
A mother's work is never done.
Unless she proclaims loudly that she is "done with this shit", in which case you should probably give her at least an hour.
— Lauren Mullen (@DraggingFeeties) March 14, 2018
3.
Good morning. My toddler just handed me a blank check from her sock drawer.
— Jennifer S. White (@yenniwhite) April 9, 2018
2.
If you think you’re your own worst critic, have kids
— NotJPo (@Peauxtassium) April 16, 2018
1.
Yes I know I forgot to pick up my kid from school but don’t worry my brain is good and fine, it still remembers all the lyrics to the Moulin Rouge soundtrack I haven’t listened to in 15 years
— tragic ally (@TragicAllyHere) April 17, 2018