1. Scented soap
2. Deodorant cap
3. Bottle cap
4. Penis ring with spikes on
5. Silicon balls
The patient stated these were “You know, for when your husband leaves town.”
6. A ball
7. Bike reflector
8. A sponge
Patient was “on period, inserted non-birth control sponge in vagina so she could swim.”
10. Hot towel
11. A phone and money
‘Was having sex with boyfriend when he put phone and money in vagina.’
13. A candlestick
14. A lollipop
15. 15 stone balls – of which only 14 were found.
“Using massaging urethral vaginal stone balls, the string holding 15 balls together dissolved, can only find 14 balls.”
16. Toy wand
Certain objects are designed to go into a vagina: tampons, condoms, diaphragms, and sex toys. Never place things inside the vagina that are not designed to go in it; Doctors call such items “foreign bodies” and they could cause pain, a foul odor, infections, and even bleeding. If you accidentally get something stuck up there, get thee to a gynecologist STAT. It’s far better to seek immediate professional attention rather than digging up there yourself and possibly making things worse.
Oh, and for any fellas reading this: Don’t feel too smug just yet. Y’all have a way tinier hole and still managed to get some truly confounding items lodged up in there.