Let me tell you something about New York City.
I have lived here for 24 years. I have seen the ups, the downs, the ins, the outs – the good parts, the bad parts – of this city. I’ve walked through Manhattan, Queens, The Bronx, Brooklyn and even Staten Island. I’ve seen the craziness, the beauty, the chaos and all the in between. I’ve also smelled every single part of New York City that I have seen in my 24 years here and – it doesn’t smell f*cking good.
New York City is one of the most populated cities in the country – there’s a lot of different people here and we’re all crowded, rushing and screaming at each other as we walk by. The morning train smells like coffee, anxiety and lox and onion bagels. The after-work-train smells like anxiety, impatience and a whole lot of BO.
So, I have zero clue as to why a company would want to create a candle that smells like New York City. Zero. Clue.
But, diptyque Paris created this candle –
NYC exclusive candle captures the scent of the city that never sleeps... pic.twitter.com/7siJFaTumF— diptyque Paris (@diptyqueparis) August 5, 2017
And, I’m so confused my brain actually hurts. Does it smell like pizza and bagels? Does it smell like 8th avenue in the morning? Does it smell like roasted nuts on every Manhattan corner? Does it smell like dirty water dogs? Does it smell like the Hudson River?
WHAT IS NEW YORK CITY’S UNIVERSAL SMELL?!? I NEED ANSWERS PEOPLE.
Also – Twitter was not having it either, because, if you’re from New York (like me) you have no time for this nonsense.
So it smells like a mixture of urine, BO, and pizza?— Nikki Jo (@ColorMeNeurotic) August 7, 2017
Does it smell like this shoe filled with raw meat I saw floating in a storm drain while walking to work this morning? pic.twitter.com/O4eP0yTiaO— Cerra (@thecerrashow) August 7, 2017
So it smells like 3 people covered in cheese, halal food and vomit fighting in a broom closet filled w wet garbage? HEARD. YOU.— PhantomOfTheChakras (@_wonderfrankie) August 7, 2017
How about a suite of NYC candle scents? "Rush Hour in the Summer" "A Walk Down Canal" "My Uber last night"— Adrienne M (@adrienn_e) August 7, 2017
I've always wondered what urine on fire would smell like— Wizard of Dog (@WizardofDog) August 7, 2017
chopped cheese, cars, and subway— Sean Marcano (@Sean_Marcano) August 7, 2017
It's bus fumes, hot dogs (from the little carts) and urine. Nope.— Joan Ford (@jmzinct) August 7, 2017
The scent of filth, sin and devastation— benda nee (@NattEven) August 8, 2017
So it smells like dog pee on hot summer day?— Lizzy??? (@LizChow_) August 7, 2017
I would like to purchase zero thousand candles please— HomeOfJeffers (@HomeofJeffers) August 8, 2017
Shit finna smell like Starbucks, Newports, Halal food and tourist ?— Smacked ? (@y0urstrulywendy) August 8, 2017
Does it smell of the liquid which leak from dumpsters, urine and Subway electrical arching?— H A Rhoads (@HotSoupHiram) August 8, 2017
Ill use this candle the next time I'm trying to get rid of a guest.— Soeroo ? (@DemonPeachBaby) August 8, 2017
Probably smells god awful— Tony (@Tv_15_1981) August 8, 2017