People think that women are supposed to be “classy, elegant and feminine,” but in reality – women are supposed to be whoever they f*cking want to be. That’s right – we like doing things that are not always classy and elegant, we like being weird and dirty and raunchy and – if we like it, we’ll do it.
It’s time to end these stereotypes that just because you have a vagina, you have to act and be a certain way. I’ll rub my face in the dirt if I want to – and I’ll rock a facemask on that night if I want to, too.
And – I’ll enjoy every minute of it.
1. Burping really loud in satisfaction after a meal.
2. Playing with our boobs while we lay in bed.
3. Smelling our armpits to make sure we don’t have any BO.
4. Taking a huge poop and realizing we’re not fat, it was just gas.
5. Picking the dirty from underneath our nails.
6. Smelling a shirt to see if it’s clean or dirty – and still wearing it if it doesn’t smell, even if it is dirty.
7. Complimenting another girl on her outfit and making her day.
8. Using dry shampoo for a week straight to avoid washing our hair.
9. Going bra-less.
10. Watching porn.
11. Licking our fingers after going face deep into a plate of Buffalo Wings.
12. Chugging a beer, or three.
13. Masturbating.
14. Using our manicured fingernails to pick food out of our teeth.
15. Plucking out an ingrown hair on the very first try.
16. Sleeping naked.
17. Wiping our sweaty faces on the inside of our t-shirts.
18. Picking out a wedgey – front or back.
19. Eating cold pizza from the night before.
20. Telling everyone f*ck you when they call us “unladylike.”