The word “slut” is a stupid one to use derisively. In 2018, we as sexual beings—regardless of gender—are allowed to sleep with whoever we want without fear of judgment and name-calling.
Also—who are these people managing to find 2-3 people to have sex with them daily? Share your secrets.
23. A whorecrux joke seems appropriate here.
“I met this girl at Universal Studios Hollywood and we hit it off. After about 30 minutes I snuck her in the men’s room at the Harry Potter part of the park and she started riding me in the handicap stall.
Worth noting that the bathrooms have Moaning Myrtle over the intercom the whole time which made it awkward and hilarious because I came right when Myrtle started Moaning.”
22. This is like voluntary kidnapping, and I support it.
I had just broken up with a boyfriend of over 3 years. I got drunk by myself at a bar, wandered outside to smoke, and saw a really cool motorcycle. I asked the group of guys standing outside whose bike it was, and one of them said “mine”. I hopped on back and said “okays let’s go.” He handed me a helmet and away we went.
Great sex, but in hindsight it’s super rude to sit on other people’s motorcycles without asking.
21. Ah, the ole poophole loophole:
I got f*cked in the ass before receiving my first kiss. Given, we made out after, but still. Edit: Bi guy, it was a tinder hookup. ???????
20. We are amused.
Banged a guy from Tinder and invited another over as he was leaving. Both were from two hours away and probably passed each other. That part amused me.
19. Luckily, this seems to have worked out just fine.
Pulled off my shirt on the first date with my husband. Expecting it to be a one night stand and having zero experience with them. I guess in my immature brain I just thought if I take off my shirt and show tits that was enough to initiate sex?
He looked at me very concerned, gave me an extra blanket and then fell asleep. I cried lol. I am such a loser.
18. Honestly, fellas: Please bathe in between girls.
I found out 2 girls I was friends with but also wouldn’t mind sleeping with actually had a bet for who could sleep with me first. With the help of my roomates I left the bar with Girl A and took her home while they took girl B for food.
Girl A lived on campus so wasn’t going to stay over and girl B was staying over in our spare room anyways. Got rid of girl A in time for girl B to come home and we did it. I wouldn’t let her blow me because she would for sure have tasted girl A.
Both girls thought they won. I won.
Dance club in Baltimore (Boh-dome, 1999ish), met a girl from yahoo chat there. While drinking and dancing, stepped away to the restroom. A different girl who remembered me from a previous clubbing night followed me into the bathroom.
Ended up sneaking out the back door and banging her over the hood of a random parked car. Went back into the club, found my date, left the club. Stopped at my work to use the restroom. Banged her in my cubicle at 2am. Not a bad night.
16. Short and sweet!
“Wanked someone off in McDonald’s toilets.”
15. This is just good business.
I f*cked a girl for gas money and a laptop to piss off her dad and mom when I was 19. Basically I was everything her white collar lawyer father hated and she wanted to piss him off,
So she bought me a macbook air and a couple collared shirts and a nice pair of pants. In return I was to take her out on a date in my sh*tty two color truck and sneak into her house for late night sex. Win for me because I got the better end of that deal.
14. This sounds like a scene straight out of a porno.
Got blown in a garage by a female friend while all our friends partied on the other side of the wall. The fridge of beer was in there but thanks to the angle of the room she couldn’t be seen if you just walked in.
3 friends walked in and I pretended to be on the phone and asked what beer they wanted and threw it to them so they didn’t come al the way into the room.
A super hot girl walked in and I literally had to look her in the eye and throw her a beer while making conversation… while I nutted in my friend’s mouth.
BJ girl was a trooper. I think she’s married now.
13. WHO are these people finding 2-a-days?
Probably f*cking a tinder girl in the parking lot after work. Then going to another girl’s house just to hang out, only to end up f*cking in her bed. Great day.