Dating someone with a different body than you is pretty much par for the course, unless you’re dating your twin. If so, please seek help. The rest of us generally don’t date people we can share all our clothes with. Until now, that hasn’t been something that needs a name, it’s just called being in a relationship. A new article from Yahoo News has decided to make things far more complicated by labeling the common experience of dating someone with a different body type as a “mixed weight relationship.” Excuse me. What?
Emma and Stuart Grundy are a couple in Manchester who have been dating since their teens. Emma is allegedly over 200 lbs heavier than her husband, a fact that someone decided needed to be covered by the news. Emma supposedly attracted attention after posting about her relationship to Facebook, writing, “He’s thin and I’m fat but that’s how we roll.”
Honestly, good for them. It’s nice when two people are in love. But why exactly does this need to be called anything other than “two people in love?” Writer Roxanne Gay commented on the idea on Twitter, which has brought it even more attention:
Just learned the phrase "mixed weight relationship." ok
— roxane gay (@rgay) August 29, 2018
Interviewer: "So, I presume you're in a mixed weight relationship?"
Me: ::deletes interview::
— roxane gay (@rgay) August 29, 2018
As most people are commenting, the entire concept is ridiculous.
Ah, yes. Studies show that couples in mixed weight relationships typically engage in mixed height relationships as well.
— Soraya Giaccardi (@sorayagiaccardi) August 29, 2018
What in the fucking hell is a "mixed weight relationship"?? Are partners supposed to weigh the exact same? Cause anything else is "mixed" whether it's 100lbs or 350lbs. Wyh is wrong with people.
— Amy Hayward (@AmyHayward1979) August 29, 2018
I mean, wouldn't everyone be in a mixed weight relationship? The odds of both people weighing the exact same are slim. https://t.co/xDH1KMbusT
— Brittany Kibler (@BrittanyKibler6) August 29, 2018
I just heard the term "mixed weight relationship" used in a serious tone. What the fuck man
— Nathan Stewart (@N_Stewart216) August 28, 2018
It’s definitely the kind of thing that will catch people’s attention for being ridiculous, but slowly work its way into every day use. Some seem to see it as more insidious than stupid, warning that it’s going to be a phrase used to covertly body-shame people. If you make it seem like dating someone heavier than you is so strange and out-of-the-ordinary that it needs a whole special label, it will make people far more self-conscious about it. Consequently, they feel even more self-conscious about their own bodies and their relationships. That’s messed up.
The term “mixed weight relationship” is trash. It’s a gross new way for cis men to call themselves brave for not dating a skinny person.
BURN ???????? IT ???????? DOWN ????????
— Zackery Alexzander Stephens (@ZackeryAStephen) August 29, 2018
More ways to fat shame folks ???? Although I've never understood this? Unless you and your partner are EXACTLY the same weight, then ALL relationships are mixed weight? https://t.co/RvrazxeRVt
— no (@slitcutslash) August 29, 2018
We don’t call it a mixed-hair relationship when a bald person dates someone with a full head of hair. Or a mixed-attractiveness relationship when someone super pretty pairs off with someone less so.
So why are the media focusing on weight, specifically the weight of the woman?
— Stephanie Yeboah (@NerdAboutTown) May 25, 2018
What annoys me about the “mixed-weight relationship” thing is that they know full well most relationships are mixed-weight. They just want a term to further alienate plus size people and frame their relationships as fetishes, or an unlikely stroke of luck for the heavier partner.
— Hol???????? (@hollycassell) April 22, 2018
Date whoever whatever size person you like with whatever size body you have. We’re only one this earth once, find love wherever you can.