12. Or worse yet: “Thought Leader.” Or “influencer.”
11. You can’t expect to spend the rest of your days with someone who laughs at dusty ass memes.
10. Or someone who you’d be embarrassed to tag on Instagram.
9. Or someone who dresses like Stan Gable from Revenge of the Nerds.
8. It’s of utmost importance that any potential partner follows the same beverage rules as yourself:
7. For example, making any sort of sounds means instant disqualification.
6. Of course food etiquette is also vital.
5. Specifically, Italian food etiquette.
4. Although at this point we’ll just take a date with someone who doesn’t have the same diet as a toddler.
3. Some things are simply unforgivable.
2. How could you ever trust again after witnessing something like this?
1. Sleep with one eye open.
