In relationships, there may come a point in time where a couple is just not happy with each other anymore. While they’re still in love and want to be together, they are both at their ends – angry, fighting and constantly feeling jaded and hurt – so, instead of breaking up forever, one party proposes a break. A break, or basically taking space, from your significant other may seem like a great idea in retrospect – you get the space you need to clear your head, reassess and figure out what you want and need from your relationship – but, it doesn’t always work like that. Taking a break from a relationship can get messy very, very quickly. While you think in your mind that you’ll end up back in each other’s arms – multiple things can go down and cause the ultimate downfall of your relationship. Just look at Ross Geller and Rachel Green from friends – they were on a break.
1. You and your partner will have different ideas of what a “break” should look like.
When one person proposes you go on a break, the other person is usually not happy and pretty jaded by the idea. In many people’s eyes, a break is one step closer to a break-up – because, a lot of times it’s a prelude to the inevitable. If both parties in the relationship decide they do want to take space and go on a break, they usually disagree on what “rules” should be in place – do you speak to other people, do you see other people, do you speak or see each other?
It can become messy and chaotic if you’re not on the same page as the person you are with and – if you’re proposing to go on a break – chances are you won’t be on the same page at all.
2. You’re missing the bigger picture of what’s going on.
If you want to go on a break instead of breaking up – you’re neglecting to realize you’re not getting exactly what you need in your relationship. In fact, you are putting a band-aid on something that will continue to bleed out, no matter how many times you cover it. When you need to be apart from someone you love in that fashion, it’s because being with them doesn’t work for you.
Instead of running from that reality, it’s better to cut ties with someone you cannot fully be happy, nor work with, and make room in both of your lives for people who will love and appreciate you the way you both need.