16.
I told my girlfriend I wrote her a poem but it was just the theme song to King of Queens. pic.twitter.com/2B1H6n7XtX
— Mike Recine (@mikerecine) August 29, 2017
17.
[Funeral]
Me: "Do you mind if I say a word?"
Widow: "Please do"
Me *clears throat: "Plethora!"
Widow: "Thank you. That means a lot."
— Frank Whitehouse (@WheelTod) September 3, 2017
18.
Two Ex-Googlers Want To Replace Your Local Ice Cream Parlor With A Shrieking Void That Uses Your Fears As Training Data
— Kevin Twohy (@kevintwohy) September 13, 2017
19.
things have been kinda weird since i moved in with a twitter porn bot pic.twitter.com/eLj4Pi8y7s
— goth turtle (@dubstep4dads) July 26, 2017
20.
if my dick small, that's our business. don't bring it up while we play monopoly with my mom, its not my fault you can't manage your money
— Big Uzi Vert (@BlvckGrip) September 9, 2017