Have you ever wanted to have a little chain and jewel dangle awkwardly between your legs while you try to walk around or swim like a normal person?
Well now you’re in luck! Whoever you are.
A Japanese company called BoDivas is selling jewelry for that exact purpose. It’s called crotch jewelry and it’s… well, it’s jewelry for your crotch.
Yeah. It just kinda hangs there, off the crotch of your underwear or bikini bottom. It looks… nice? And can be worn, as the company ad-copy says, “on the beach,” or “in the room.” My two favorite places!
It’s super not clear why this is a thing, or if anyone would actually want to wear it. The hashtag #Crotchjewelry is currently devoid of any actual crotch jewelry on both Instagram and Twitter. So if this is going to become the latest millennial fad we have some serious work to do. You think avocado toast rose to the top on its own?!
Currently, the vagecorations only cost $19.50 — which is pretty damn affordable. Think about it, do you really have anything better to spend $19.50 on? What do you need, groceries? Pony up the dough!
Get out there, people! Dangle chains off your crotches and show the world!
PS: Because I know you’re wondering, yes they sell nipple jewelry too.