11.
let’s hang, here’s when i’m free pic.twitter.com/a6VIJcZZj7
— Karen Chee (@karencheee) January 23, 2020
12.
I'm not an avid reader of food magazines but if Toast On A Paper Towel Monthly ever comes out, yes, I'd like a subscription.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) January 24, 2020
13.
i can’t remember what i ate for breakfast yesterday but i will never forget the issue of Seventeen magazine where they said the most flattering first date look for girls with big boobs is a polo shirt
— julia reinstein ???? (@juliareinstein) January 21, 2020
14.
i’m angy pic.twitter.com/RjxsP3HZv9
— i miss obama (@spinsewz) January 23, 2020
15.
me: okay time to sleep
brain: ok
brain:
brain: hey
brain: HEY
me: … what
brain: u ever wonder what bear milk tastes like
me:
brain: do…do u think it would give us powers
— nash™ (@thenashleysays) January 18, 2020
16.
those 4 hairs on your ankle as soon as you’re done shaving your legs.. pic.twitter.com/ePkXATKA0g
— kim. (@KimmyMonte) January 21, 2020
17.
me, an intellectual: I will not touch anything in this museum because I love rules and deeply respect artists and their work
my brain: touch the chunky paint
— danielle weisberg the railway cat (@danielleweisber) January 24, 2020
18.
I’m by far not the best person but by far the worst thing I’ve ever done is accidentally touch the mailman through my house’s mail slot. I have never before heard the sort of noise he made after reaching into what he hoped was the cold embrace of a mail slot and finding a hand.
— Kayla Ancrum (@KaylaAncrum) January 20, 2020
19.
no one:
Barbie: https://t.co/QAr0WGRdRa— ellie schnitt (@holy_schnitt) January 20, 2020
20.
— dirt prince (@pant_leg) January 23, 2020