You know those tweets that you read on your phone, laugh hysterically at, then pass over to the nearest person and say, “look at this?”
These are those funny tweets. The funniest tweets on the web.
Also, what better way to pass the time between now and the next Game of Thrones episode than laughing?
1.
EVERY WOMAN IN MY LIFE: juggling 3 jobs, does yoga, cooks, goes to therapy, remembers everyone's birthday
THEIR BOYFRIENDS: once almost made a dinner reservation but turns out the place was closed
— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) April 17, 2019
2.
This cretin has been dropping sticks down our chimney for weeks and today he finally accidentally dropped himself, this is the face of someone who knows they’ve been HAD pic.twitter.com/VlVIt9dqwG
— Damp Fumi (@blacksmoke1033) April 18, 2019
3.
*notre dame burns down*
no one:
every white girl: here is a pic of me in front of notre dame. heartbreaking. but also plz know that I went there. so sad. but also I’ve been to Paris.
— Jane Greene (@JaneGre23729817) April 16, 2019
4.
This image is killing me pic.twitter.com/H7R8RHzrtB
— Dave (@That_dose_) April 21, 2019
5.
Hallelujah is such a beautiful song. I still remember the first time I heard it, in the soundtrack to Shrek
— sean maciel (@seanmaciel) April 16, 2019
6.
7.
Nobody:
Absolutely no one:
Not a single soul on this Earth:
Not even their mom:
iNfLuEnCeR: “A lot of you have asked about my skin care routine…”
— Donovan (@cxcope) April 16, 2019
8.
9.
10.
Just watched a man bringing home a goldfish on the train accidentally pop the bag- fish flops onto the floor. 3 people swarm to save him (the fish not the man). Guy chugs the last of his coffee and throws the fish in his cup. Lady next to him empties in her bottle of water.
— Hannah Baxter (@Isapalindrome) April 17, 2019
11.
scientist: dick bug
other scientist: no
scientist: penis beetle
other scientist: no
scientist: cock roach
other scientist: ok sure
— Kellen (@captainkalvis) April 5, 2019
12.
— A Literal Homosexual (@kyry5) April 18, 2019
13.
just because i loved you at one point does not mean i will always love you… I am not Whitney Houston
— ✯ (@retiredblunts) April 15, 2019
14.
My sister is trying to have a baby and my mom is continuing to be a headass pic.twitter.com/4A4YlZTDOA
— Mary (@merm__) March 31, 2019
15.
this facebook status is a piece of modern art pic.twitter.com/cWast2QTkZ
— harry moore (@Harry_Moore_) April 17, 2019
16.
everybody shut the fuck up and look at these vegetable frogs riding a vegetable bus pic.twitter.com/MdY3Wp8HSi
— banana bread (@lexizinger) April 16, 2019
17.
pronouncing testosterone like minestrone just to be annoying
— Kivan Beans (@KivaBay) April 16, 2019
18.
My boyfriend:
Me: hey no pressure but if we got married this week on 4/20 our 50th anniversary would be 4/20/69 just something to think about
— ashley ? (@notashleywintle) April 15, 2019
19.
— tyler (@SecretShoot) April 21, 2019
20.
— 北島弓小K (@MAXK5551) April 16, 2019
21.
pyramids by frank ocean is actually about the bass pro shops in memphis pic.twitter.com/OWfl0aIVxa
— RIC RICO (@INTERNETRICO) April 21, 2019
22.
I wanna be on queer eye, but only the first day of queer eye. I want five gay men to come into my home and insult my things.
— Big Joel (@biggestjoel) April 17, 2019
23.
Attenborough has no respect for crabs. Always gives them ridiculous music. They are jesters to him
— Thomas Gorton (@AngstromHoot) November 6, 2016