My entire life, when I washed my hair in the shower, I’d stick the hairs that came loose on the shower wall and twirl them altogether into a gnarly hair-spiral-clump at the end so it would be easier to pull off and throw away in one piece.
It wasn’t until I reached college that I met one of my best friends, and she was like “I do that too!” and then another roommate piped up and was like “hey, I do that three!”
I was stunned. How did we all, instinctively, know to finger-twirl our loose shower-hairs? What else did I do that other women did that nobody ever talked about?
These 31 things, apparently:
1.
Behind every strong woman is 5 other strong women who proofread her email real quick when they had a second
— Gabby Noone (@twelveoclocke) April 25, 2016
2.
I always feel like I'm forgetting something whenever I leave the house carrying less than like 9 purses full of garbage
— audrey farnsworth (@audipenny) July 16, 2015
3.
I think I’m starting to understand girls
Calling another girl bitch = probably friends
Calling another girl sweetie = definitely not friends
— Ryan Hartley (@RyannHartley) November 25, 2017
4.
Girls don’t actually shop we just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’
— tories not welcome here (@abblucia) October 1, 2018
5.
women aren't weak. I discreetly waxed my ankles during a phone interview once and didn't drop one hint. you think this shit is a game? I'll eat your husband.
— Audrey Porne (@AudreyPorne) August 29, 2018
6.
Women are so adorable when you compliment their dress and the dress has pockets lol
“Hey! Thats a really nice dress!”
Woman: Thanks! IT HAS POCKETS! ????
And then she puts her hands in them and show you lol
— Different Animal. Same Beast. (@TheOTAPShow) August 20, 2018
7.
Wearing black opaque tights: I am a sleek and sexy puma of a woman
Wearing any other colour of opaque tights: I teach art at the gnome school
— Georgia Wags (@georgia_wags) September 6, 2018
8.
You ever pull your cardigan closed across your chest with crossed arms and suddenly feel like a sentimental widow stepping out onto her beachfront porch at night, fondly remembering her past lover?
— Den (@daniellechezzy) February 4, 2019
9.
my ex from a couple years ago has a new girlfriend and she liked and unliked one of my pics from a year ago and if youre out there i just want you to know its ok it happens to the best of us good luck out there
— Hana (@ohanabaig) March 5, 2019
10.
girls be like "can you get my lip gloss from my purse? just reach in & head left, take a right at the wallet then turn left til you pass 3 nutrigrain bars & take your next right then head straight & it should be there. if you've hit the 2007 target receipts you've gone too far"
— jake (@squidslippers) August 24, 2018
11.
so excited to transition from wearing the same 5 things in the summer to the same 5 things in the fall
— Alice Roth (@aliceroth) September 19, 2018
12.
I am SUPER chill unless I'm hungry, overheated, running late, waiting in a long line, in traffic, at the doctor, on a beach, getting a massage, having a cocktail, sleeping,
— Kendra Alvey (@Kendragarden) July 31, 2018
13.
only two things are certain in this life: death and that if you fall asleep in a tank top when you wake up one of your tiddies will be out
— Alexis Wilkinson (@OhGodItsAlexis) February 8, 2016
14.
How to apply mascara:
Pull wand from tube
Open your eyes like a haunted doll coming to life— Hi, it's Abby. Yep. (@abbycohenwl) February 21, 2018
15.
Me, to myself: Okay, just be cool, don't say anything weird
Any woman: *says something that makes me laugh*
Me, out loud: THAT'S HILARIOUS WE SHOULD BE SISTER WIVES BUT WITHOUT THE HUSBAND
— Not Sara (@smithsara79) May 22, 2018
16.
*owns 37 t-shirts*
*wears exactly 4 of them*— Myrrh (@ixix82) August 29, 2017
17.
are you even a girl if you don't tell people you're wearing jeans and a nice top ????
— ebs (@ebonyfinchh) June 19, 2016
18. Stood up and felt the full force of that flow anyway.
19. Pooed way more than normal thanks to those notorious period shits.
20. Or the opposite, and been stopped up for days at a time.
21. Wiped after pooing only to see more blood than poo on the paper.
22. Waddled like a penguin when you woke up because you have a pad full of blood.
23. Asked someone to check the back of your clothes for leaks.
24. Tried to do it yourself in vain.
25. Used toilet paper as an emergency.
26. Not been able to tell the difference between period pains and “I need to shit” pains until the last minute.
27. Tried to subtly rearrange your pad but looked like you’re pulling out a wedgie.
28. Had blood move up towards the back of your butt, and wondered how the fuck it got there.
29. Been moved to tears by something slightly inconsequential, like finding out a show you were planning to watch was taken off Netflix.
30. Experienced the full spectrum of human emotions within the space of a few hours.
31. Dreaded the second and third days of your period before they’ve even happened.
h/t BuzzFeed