35 Inanimate Objects Sexier Than Blake Shelton

People magazine named Blake Shelton the ‘Sexiest Man Alive’ and this is wrong on so, so many levels. First of all, Blake Shelton is historically a racist and a homophobe. Second of all, Idris Elba and Jeff Goldblum were robbed, ROBBED I TELL YOU. Third of all, all these inanimate objects are sexier than Blake Shelton:

1. These waves:

2. This perfect ice cream scoop:

3. This snowball:

4. This pancake:

5. This assortment of fungi: